Tuesday, August 29, 2017

"I Keep Slipping Away"

My husband tells me my "boyfriend" has been unhappy for a year. The bf has said nothing to me about it. I mention that he didn't mention he was going on a roadtrip (which is funny because he said he was too broke to go out but I am not antibodies mother) and my hucband is quick to say "He is going somewhere he can find comfort" in a condescending tone. I could only reply with "Awesome."A guy who would rather text the universe as he sits next to me. Boo fuckin hoo.
He also tells me I don't let him (referring to himself) in. He has had the luxury of not being humiliated and betrayed by close to everyone he knows or has grown up with. What his drunk self fails to realize is I don't let anyone who hurts me all the way in...and he is a pissy tart and talks to me like I am an idiot when he drinks to the point of getting drunk..which is more often than I care to mention. Despite having a blacked out ex abuse me. Despite how many times I tell him "I hate you when you're drunk." Like how he says "I can't wait to see you" today then I come home to an empty house for almost 4 hrs because he was out getting drunk. But yeah. I don't let him "in". I am the problem and am a frosty bitch. Gee..I guess his drunk ass is so right! I believe I have traded one hell for a hell of a different color. Or maybe I just have a knack for finding all the different hells in existence. I will never be good enough for anyone...but luckily I stopped trying to be years ago. I hate most people...such annoying creatures we are.